ego at large

the public is hereby warned about a mental patient that escaped from the facility on an undetermined date. several police reports have been collected regarding a deranged female spotted in several locations, mostly around makati, with the following eye-witness descriptions: in mid-20s, 5'4" with high-heeled shoes, thick and overly lipsticked lips, nostrils bigger than the craters on the moon, long, not-regularly-shampooed hair with lice infestation and was last seen wearing something really, really horrible. the suspect, currently known as "excrementia" is extremely and dangerously annoying. we repeat, the suspect is extremely, dangerously annoying.

accurate police sketch of the suspect.
we apologize for your subsequent nightmares.

two witnesses, a couple madly in love with each other, encountered the suspect at an intersection in makati. according to their released statements, the suspect "walked like the ground was a runway and talked as if she was the queen of the world." the very beautiful and sexy female witness with an amazing rack and delectable legs, who chose to be hidden under the name "eatmybust", was a nurse and, upon listening to the suspect's verbal diarrhea, assumed that the suspect "was suffering, or more appropriately, reveling in grandiose delusion." the male witness with a big cock who chose to be hidden under the name "mrbigcock", agreed with his beloved companion and said, "i agree." according to the couple, they left the suspect "smoking a cigarette under the rain for fear that it multiplies when wet." the witnesses then went to sm mall of asia, watched monsters vs. aliens on imax and fell in love with each other even more.

a firm believer of the slut-til-death movement which it started itself, the suspect is presumed to have gained a cult following of idiots who have been lured to kiss its ass, due to the suspect's ability to suck brain cells out of people. if you have any information regarding the whereabouts of the suspect, please do not hesitate to keep it to yourself. it is also highly recommended for your safety that if suspect is on sight, do not approach for any reason. best course of action in the presence of the suspect is to ignore it.

p.s. whatever, layla. you're such a loser.