JUNO by jaiskizzy

the gist: after kitty pryde played tag with juggernaut in x-men 3, she left the school and moved to the suburbs and started a band with the less-talky guy from superbad (not mclovin) who now is a member of the track team and wears very short shorts all the time. anyways, something happens on a couch and kitty, who now calls herself juno, gets pregnant and decides to give the baby up for adoption to teen wolf too's todd and the ass-kickin alias chick who was also in daredevil because they got married but cant make a baby no matter how much sex they have. juno's father by the way is j. jonah jameson from spider-man but he doesn't shout a lot this time.

the reaction: until the day i die, i'll always wish i could do my high school years over. i really missed out a lot, especially in priapic conquests, by being such a wuss. that is why i will make sure that my future son avenges me. anyways, high school is the threshold for discoveries to would-be adults and the end result of one of those discoveries is unwanted pregnancy, which is mostly hell for the guilty parties. that's where juno got blessed. her parents don't go nuclear, the baby's dad doesn't breath down her nape, her school doesn't expel her, the couple who would adopt the baby seem cool and everything's accompanied by a soundtrack to put on high-priority downloading. but what seems like a conflict-lacking storyline actually comes off quite compelling, thanks to the wonderfully written script.

this splendor of a script was scribed by a (former) stripper named diablo cody. i salute her for penning a brilliant, biting screenplay that's like a machine gun loaded with uniquely intelligent and funny bullets. although it is hugely told from a female perspective, it is on a level of entertainment suited for both sexes and not as girlie as, say, the sappy jane austen movies that no man would ever admit to having watched and, yikes, cried on. every banter between characters and every off-kilter remark that escapes juno's cute mouth deserves attention. they feel like something we all want to say but not in the same way. and with a premise that's practically similar to knocked up, it's amazing how the two films are entirely different from each other. one of the scenes i liked was the one where jason bateman's character mark tells dario-argento-loving juno about h.g. lewis and they watch a video of a woman having her stomach impaled by a large metal thingy and the pregnant juno likes it.

ellen page was perfect. this girl can act. she was scary in hard candy but stayed cute the whole time, which is creepy. that movie just made me stay away from underage girls even more. now here she is working her mumbo-jumbo again and she just nails every witty line. made me forget for a while there that the weird girls during my high school years were never as cute as her or ever hung out with a hottie in braids and schoolgirl skirts (omg olivia thirlby). michael cera barely said anything and he was just great. there are movie dudes who give great love speeches and then there's michael cera, lord of the low-key. the rest of the cast are older and have more experience so let's just keep the praises to the newbies.

touted as last year's little miss sunshine, juno bagged four oscar nominations (best picture, best actress, director and best original screenplay) and i would be darn surprised if this gem of a film doesnt win at least one of those. it's definitely one of the best of 2007's releases, proving that not all comedies have to be slapstick, gross, r-rated or a spoof of some other movie. this is one baby you won't want to abort.

the good: the screenplay, the cast, the soundtrack, just about everything.
the bad: it's quite girl-biased.
the ugly: the crotch closeups.
the verdict: 9 strawberry panties.


skizzy pop.