gist: in this updated version of a classic, julia stiles and a dude who resembles one of my high school friends (topaquits!!) are the oblivious parents of the devil’s son whom they have aptly named damien. some sinister shit starts spreading as the path to power is paved for the prince. a priest preaches prophecies, papa ponders, peter piper picked a peck of pickled pepper!
not a good film. okay. but not good. that is, on its own. but if you’d compare it to the original, it plummets down to crap territory. mostly, it was faithful to the original, but the things they changed though didnt work. i remember how creepy the old omen had been and how this remake wasnt (or maybe because i was just a kid then). this one felt like watching a long episode of csi miami, with csi (las vegas) as the original omen. well... yes, it kept me awake. yes the impaling was cool, and the decapitation even cooler. yes there was one suspenseful scene involving an air bubble and a startler involving snow. but beyond that? close, but no cuban. i actually had a hard time completing the summary above, because sentence number one was the only solid definition for this movie. everything else that followed and surrounded that concept seemed like random stuff thrown in for padding, like cotton to a flat-chested girl’s bra. sure, they contribute to the idea that this boy is satan’s offspring sent to give the earth a beating, but they don’t really form a concrete mold to hold a well-structured story together. anyways, three-quarters into the movie, i already had thought of a nice way to review this film. as a tribute to the apparent collapse of the julia stiles’ career (what happened to you, girl?!) i present to you…
10 things i hate about the omen 1. julia stiles. she looks fat and old. 2. damien. looked scary in the trailers. acted scary in the movie. 3. the red stuff. too forced. 4. clues to the death. a la final destination. 5. the nanny. too obvious. i would have fired her at once. 6. the dogs. could have been scarier. 7. the men in the gorilla suits. sheesh. 8. scaring the audience with sound volume. 9. cheapo video editing. 10. the predictable, no build-up, “that’s it?” ending.
plus there was no clear indication if damien born on 6/6/6 or the events begin in 6/6/6. because if damien was born in 6/6/6, then the movie happens in 2012, and it doesn’t look like 2012 at all. one more thing, whatever magical thing killed the other players, why didn’t it kill damien’s dad? tsk. tsk. tsk. a very very defective movie. obvious rushed to meet the 6/6/6 deadline. tsk.
the good: the impaling and the seamless decapitation.
the bad: refer to the list.
the ugly: the toothbrush commercial scene. ugh.
the verdict: 6(66) red balloons. (3 if compared to the original)
jai albert omen or the owen.
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