Friday, March 13, 2009

WATCHMEN by jaiskizzy


the gist: in alternate 80s america, where once-heralded costumed crimefighters have been outlawed by the government and a globally destructive nuclear war with russia is imminent, a retired superhero known as the comedian is found dead on the street more than a hundred feet below his high-rise apartment, killed by gravity. a former teammate, rorschach, embarks on his own investigation to find the murderer who seems to be particularly offing masked members of the society. old friends are reunited, memories are remembered and walls are repainted (with blood) as the doomsday clock ticks closer to the end of the world.

the review: fuck the long intros. i'll do my best to make this short and quick because the less is said, the better. i liked the movie. given that the graphic novel has been deemed unfilmable for so long and the weird and cool alan moore refuses credit for any adaptation, zack snyder has done quite an achievement. and not only by squeezing a 12-chapter story into a 3-hour movie. you see, there's a dvd out there where they animated the comic book panels and turned it into sort of an audiobooky (because one guy does all the voices, even the female characters) cartoon, reminiscent of the old marvel superhero 2d shows. compared to that, with real actors and actual sets, zack snyder's film is a couple of steps ahead in awesomeness.

yes, the paper version is still way better but the celluloid translation turns it into an entirely new experience. you now hear the voices that uttered those great lines, especially dr. manhattan's which was totally unexpected. (you'd think he would have the mighty otherworldly voice of james earl jones with a sore throat on volume 11 plus extra echo and not mild and boring like my history teacher's in high school. but it works amazingly.) you see them break through the frozen panels and move, sometimes in slow-mo, the constantly morphing inkblot on rorschach's mask alone, the origin of which didnt make it past the cutting room floor, was mesmerizing. i like how the costumes were almost exactly the same, down to the minutemen despite not having that much screen time. i smiled when silk spectre 2's costume was unzipped, not because she was about to get naked, but because it had a zipper, something we rarely see in superhero movies. that zipper contributed to grounding the whole thing in reality.

i never thought that stillwater's lead guitarist would pass off as a god with blue skin who doesn't really give a shit about humans and would effectively portray how the seemingly emotionless character eventually learns to (there is a real smiley face crater in mars btw). but the invisible badass acting award goes to jackie earle haley, the masturbating date in little children. this guy is great. unlike doc, his vocal characterization of rorschach is exactly the way i imagined it in my head. the two moments he screams like a madman were very powerful. perfect segue to my main gripe at the movie: the other actors didnt really do much and acted like they were still two-dimensional drawings. anyways, having read the graphic novel before watching the movie isn't a requirement. it doesn't even assure one would enjoy the film more. if you're the kind of moviegoer who just sits there depending on visuals, expecting rollercoaster ride-type of action, you will be heavily disappointed. watchmen is character-driven and story-driven and, for lack of a better symbolism, it is the kind of film that my father sleeps on. i think my father would be snoring on the theater seat around the time the bob dylan-sung opening credits is over and rorschach begins talking to himself.

though this review is probably a couple of paragraphs short of being a novel itself, there is still so much to be said about the film, a lot of which is open for debate between those who have read the graphic novel and the poor people who havent. it is not the greatest comic book movie ever made (tdk, imho), but it is a feat of filmmaking nonetheless. the movie has brains and balls. i will watch watchmen again.

the good: faithfulness to source material, necessary changes
the bad: bland acting
the ugly: too many cocks.
the verdict: 9 blood-stained smiley face pins


watchamacallboy.

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